The Art of Saying NO
Do you want more simplicity in your life & fulfillment in your career? Who am I kidding - of course you do!
Last week, I polled my IG audience asking about their confidence & ability to say "No" to others, and the response was overwhelming:
91% responded saying they struggled with saying NO to friends, family, & work invites.
79% responded saying they get overwhelmed easily.
65% responded saying they struggle making decisions.
100% responded saying they wanted tips on how to up level their confidence & how to be more self-assured.
What if I told you that YOUR freedom directly hinges on your ability to say No more often?!
YES. It is true.
The most successful people I know literally say NO multiple times a day. #GAMECHANGER
This week, I'm giving you seven effective practices that are proven to work, and will remove your guilt of saying "No."
My pro tips on how say 'No' with Ease:
Everything begins with Self-Assurance & Self-Confidence. People pleasers struggle with saying "No" in fear of letting others down. Understanding what your limits & priorities are, is critical to saying 'No' (or yes!) with confidence.
Like any new skill, it takes practice. Practice saying 'No' to small gestures like family gatherings or Zoom dates with friends. Over time, saying No to larger asks, such as one from your client or boss, will become less challenging.
Before committing to an answer, walk away from the q for a moment. Before you respond, to the text or email, walk away from the request (sleep on it even) & make sure you are in a state of alignment & clarity before responding.
Address the question: Is it within my scope or expectations? A lot of my clients ask me to do a lot of things for them (quick calls, text messages, work outside my scope, etc), and this is precisely why I lean on contracts to keep us both on the same page.That way when areas of fuzziness or gray-zone pop up, I can refer back to our contract & specifically state my boundaries & delineate expectations of the relationship.
Live with authenticity. When it comes to family, my network, & friendships, I keep it real. Under commit, over deliver.
Drop the "I am so sorry..." You do NOT need to apologize for being busy, setting boundaries, or being imperfect.
No. So many examples below of how I say NO without feeling guilty about it.
Examples of how to respectfully decline an offer (all are examples of which I've used):
"This is outside my scope, unfortunately, I cannot commit to this project. Thank you for thinking of me!"
"No, please do not sign me up for your weekly newsletter. I did not know this was an expectation prior to signing up for this program."
"No, I am unable to lower my package rates for you. This is my standard rate for all clients."
"Thank you for the offer, I cannot commit to this committee right now."
"I am home alone with my daughter all weekend (my husband is on call), so I am unable to schedule anything. Can we rain check for a different date?"
"Before I accept this offer, can you please be more specific as to what the role entails? I am unclear of the expectations." >>> waits for response. Response does not align with my immediate or long term priorities. >>> "Thank you so much for explaining the details to me. At this moment, I am unable to take this project on. Please keep me in the loop for future opportunities to collaborate. Thank you!"
"I am flattered you reached out! At this point, I am completely booked up for 2021 speaking engagements, so I will need to decline this offer. Can we stay in touch for 2022?"
"I cannot make dinner plans next week. I am exhausted & need to regenerate my steam. Can we circle back in a few weeks, and catch up?"
Remember: You are the Designer, CEO, & Owner of your career & your life. You teach people how to treat you, & your TIME (and how you communicate this priority) is your most valuable asset.
Quick pro-tip of the week: Every 30 days I am committed to leaving a positive review on LinkedIn, and here is why - How & When to Leave a Positive Review on LinkedIn (or FB, google, yelp, etc.)
xx
Ashlee
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Ashlee Klevens Hayes, PharmD, MHA
Executive Career Strategist
e: HELLO@RXASHLEE.COM
(SHE/HER/HERS)
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